My hipster balloon was recently popped. I went to my local “artsy” video store to rent two movies.

I had called my movie in, so I went straight to checkout. I was in an okay mood and decided to be genuine, “How are you?” I asked Artsy Clerk #2..

Artsy Clerk #2 smiled. “I’m excited to see the Matthew Barney screening tonight.”

I smiled back and waited for him to explain. There was a long pause. Uh, was I supposed to be hip enough to know Matthew Barney?

Disappointed, Artsy Clerk #2 gave me some clues, “Yeah, you know he’s Bjork’s boyfriend-- they have a child together.”

“Bjork’s current husband?” I asked. “She has two kids.”

“Yes. He directed Bjork’s video….it was amazing.” Artsy Clerk #2 spaced out for a minute. His eyebrow ring started twitching.

“Her videos are great,” I said.

“The movie is three hours long with only five lines of dialogue,” Artsy Clerk #2 looked away wistfully. “You should really see it.”

I had never gotten through 2001--A Space Odyssey. This movie wasn’t going to happen.