Breakfast At Tiffany's




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The Final Apprentice

Part of: Television

Successful Business Man has been eating sushi (even in Japan) for many more years than I have, but I disagree that Hide is one of the best sushi places in L.A., and the ambience sucks. I’m sure I have a less refined palate considering that SBM has also been fishing for years and used to make his own sushi. I didn’t want to burst his bubble when he excitedly questioned me about Hide before “The Apprentice” started, but I wasn’t going to lie. We had been to Hide before.

“It’s very good, but I like Nobu better. The rolls are good, but the sushi had too much wasabi.”

SBM didn’t understand how I could’ve reached this conclusion. He thought Nobu was overrated.

“All sushi has wasabi on it in sushi bars.”

“Well, that may be true, but it’s not as pungent.”

I tried not to make a face. I can only eat wasabi and ginger in small doses and sometimes not at all. I feel the same way about mushrooms and cilantro. My taste buds must change daily. Perhaps I should’ve had sake, but I was holding out for the celebratory Moet Chandon. I couldn’t wait for Bill to win!

I can’t deny it—I was excited for more drama with Omarosa to come to fruition. I thought to myself: Was she trying to sabotage Kwame just because she’s a bitch? Or was she one of those people who wanted attention so badly that they were okay with negative attention? I didn’t know if I should be horrified or happy for the pageantry contestants whom she trains. Omarosa was very pretty and put together—maybe a lot of them aspired to be her.

I asked SBM what he thought.

“Tiffany, you have to just look at the facts. I know you’re intrigued by people’s motivations, but that’s a waste of time. It’s impossible to figure out.”

“Yes-- but I’m a writer, and I find it interesting.”

SBM smiled at me.

Sure enough, Omarosa didn’t disappoint. She ignored her pager, cell phone and walkie talkie when Kwame tried to get in touch with her.

“She’s not a team player,” SBM reminded me.

Omarosa deemed the job arranging for the food and beverage set up for a breakfast meeting in Nick and Jessica’s suite too ordinary for a princess. She graciously passed on her job to Troy. When they met in the room later, nothing had been set up. The manager of the hotel was livid.

“What would you have done?” I asked SBM.

“I don’t rely on verbiage—everything has to be in black and white.”

Yes, that seemed logical.

However, Omarosa finally found a job that was a perfect fit: hanging out with popstars, Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson. I wonder what they thought of her. They probably just ignored her.

The rest of the finale was par for the course until the final boardroom meeting. Omarosa, of course, turned into a snake and trashed Kwame’s leadership abilities. In general, Kwame’s team thought he acted a little too calmly. Kwame defended himself with the expression: Still waters run deep. I agree, except Kwame was mistaken not to fire Omarosa as Trump and his advisers pointed out. As I had predicted, Kwame lost the game mostly because he picked Omarosa to be on his team.

Bill’s team agreed that he seemed too stressed out, though Trump and Caroline though he was cool and collected. I turned to SBM.

“What do you think about Bill running around and looking frazzled?”

“It doesn’t matter as long as he gets the job done,” said SBM.

“But you still think Kwame should win?”

“I’d hire Kwame for a hands-off managerial position. Bill would be great hands-on. I’d hire both of them, SBM explained.”

SBM was still dazzled by the fact that Kwame had gotten his MBA at Harvard.

SBM’s last thoughts on Trump: “The problem with being cute all the time is that you end up saying ungracious things to people like he said to George. Telling Kwame to get the hell out of the room was tacky.”

My favorite won. I was very happy. Bill was offered the choice of putting up a new Trump building in Chicago or overseeing a golf course in Southern California. I was hoping Bill would pick the golf course for selfish reasons.

SBM had a better reason. “The unions in Chicago are the worst. That job would be way over his head.”

“Where is Bill from?” I wondered. SBM didn’t know.

I figured it would be the deciding factor for what job Bill accepted, and it was. Bill was from Chicago. It was rewarding to watch Bill giddy and grinning from ear to ear. I hope next season’s “Apprentice” is just as good.


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